Episode 29

Refuse To Apologize

This week’s question “Why does my partner refuse to apologize?” is a big one.  Partly because we’ve all found ourselves in the position of not wanting or outright refusing to apologize to someone.  We’ve all been that person, probably more than once.  And we’ve all been the person on the receiving end of an apology—or the absence of an apology.  We’ve felt that vulnerability in calling attention to our hurt, and hopefully, we’ve all experienced the repair and connection from an apology well-stated.  So, why is such a basic, everyday thing so complicated and infrequent in practice?  And why is an effective apology so hard to do in real life?

Jules, Vickey and Rebecca really break this down, touching on why apologies are so hard both personally and culturally, why they are so vital and world-changing, and also giving each of us a roadmap for how to apologize and receive an apology well.  None of us will get it right every time, but it’s the intent and effort that matters most.  As they say in this episode, “Apologies are master level”, so you might want to bookmark this one to return to again and again.

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This podcast is not a substitute for therapy with a licensed provider.

About the Podcast

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Why Does My Partner
Answering questions from people who want help in relationships.

About your hosts

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Jules Shore

Juliane Taylor Shore LMFT, LPC, SEP specializes in trauma recovery and relational health. She has worked with couples and adults in her private practice in Austin, TX since 2009. She teaches Interpersonal Neurobiology to her interns, at local universities, and privately. When she's not working, Jules spends time in the hill country and with her husband, daughter, and dog. Learn more about Jules’ teachings at cleariskind.com
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rebecca wong

Rebecca Wong LCSWR, SEP has been practicing psychotherapy since 2003, blending modalities for relational trauma healing. She maintains a private practice in New Paltz, NY on unceded Lenapehoking land where she reside with her husband, their teens, and a handful of four-legged furry mischief-makers. Rebecca works virtually with people in the states of New York, Colorado, and Massachusetts. She also offers relationship intensives, experiential workshops. Learn more about Rebecca’s work and podcasts at connectfulness.com
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Vickey Easa

Vickey Easa LICSW has been a therapist since 2008, adding in Relational Life Therapy in 2016. She loves spreading the information of Relational Health to anyone who will listen; professionally AND personally. She sees adults, both individuals, and couples, and recently began public speaking on the topic of Healthy Self Esteem. No pets yet; her husband, two children, and watching TV keep her busy enough. Learn more about Vickey’s work at vickeyeasa.com