Episode 85
Want to Hurt Me
We talk about hurt a lot on this podcast, so much so that we released a whole mini-series called “Discord Builds Trust...No Really!” (Check it out if you haven't already!) So when this question came along, we had a lot of angles to cover. We discuss making YOU-turns on the stories we tell ourselves about what’s happening, and when lashing out is really about a deep desire to connect. We also talk healthy distance, and how sometimes compassion means taking care of yourself, not sticking around for the hope of relational safety.
The resource mentioned in this episode is the book Archaeology of the Mind by Jaak Panksepp and Lucy Biven.
Quotes:
"Compassion is care."
"If I start by meeting myself with compassion, I might be able to notice that I have some kind of resource, some kind of other option.”
"You are valuable enough to protect."
"Hope for showing up in relational health and maturity [shouldn’t] mean you're compromising your safety and deep emotional wellbeing."
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