Episode 48

Not Want to Work on Our Relationship

Relationships can be hard, even healthy ones.  They take work.  So, what does it mean when one partner doesn’t want to work on the relationship and the other does? Is it a sign that they care less than the other partner?  Does it mean their efforts are being overlooked?  How much effort and energy should a relationship take anyway?  Putting forth extra effort to take a relationship to new places involves a certain amount of risk.  Because what if it isn’t reciprocated? Will one of you evolve faster than the other?  What if, after all your efforts, the relationship doesn’t change for the better?  Putting in the work can be scary.  And what’s the role of  (and the difference between) safety and complacency?  So many questions…. Jules, Vickey and Rebecca dig into all of it as a listener asks, “Why doesn’t my partner want to work on our relationship?”

Share your questions with us at whydoesmypartner.com/contact

If you want to dive in deeper, consider registering for our online Essential Skills Relationship Bootcamp. Open to individuals, couples and therapists. Learn more at whydoesmypartner.com/events

This podcast is not a substitute for therapy with a licensed provider.

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Why Does My Partner
Answering questions from people who want help in relationships.

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About your hosts

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Jules Shore

Juliane Taylor Shore LMFT, LPC, SEP specializes in trauma recovery and relational health. She has worked with couples and adults in her private practice in Austin, TX since 2009. She teaches Interpersonal Neurobiology to her interns, at local universities, and privately. When she's not working, Jules spends time in the hill country and with her husband, daughter, and dog. Learn more about Jules’ teachings at cleariskind.com
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rebecca wong

Rebecca Wong LCSWR, SEP has been practicing psychotherapy since 2003, blending modalities for relational trauma healing. She maintains a private practice in New Paltz, NY on unceded Lenapehoking land where she reside with her husband, their teens, and a handful of four-legged furry mischief-makers. Rebecca works virtually with people in the states of New York, Colorado, and Massachusetts. She also offers relationship intensives, experiential workshops. Learn more about Rebecca’s work and podcasts at connectfulness.com
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Vickey Easa

Vickey Easa LICSW has been a therapist since 2008, adding in Relational Life Therapy in 2016. She loves spreading the information of Relational Health to anyone who will listen; professionally AND personally. She sees adults, both individuals, and couples, and recently began public speaking on the topic of Healthy Self Esteem. No pets yet; her husband, two children, and watching TV keep her busy enough. Learn more about Vickey’s work at vickeyeasa.com