Episode 83

Want to Get Back Together After Breaking Up With Me

We’re not going to lie, today’s question hit home for a lot of us here at Why Does My Partner HQ. We’re sharing our stories of relationships where it was hard to let go as we respond to this listener, whose partner keeps breaking up with her and getting back together...now more than seven times.

There’s some big YOU-turns to be made in this story, and at the center of it all is the question, “What would happen if you said: ‘No, I don’t want this?‘” Would there be grief that you’ve been avoiding? Fear of being alone? These answers could be "yes" for either person in this story. And it could also be that there’s a process going on here, and in that back and forth, there’s some kind of learning or repair going on. So, the YOU-Turn is also about realizing that if that’s what’s happening, and it doesn’t feel okay for you, what’s the cost of letting it continue?

Quotes:

Sometimes we’re learning what love is as we go.

A lot of who I was at that young age was who I was told to be.

Clear is kind, and unclear is unkind. -Brené Brown 

Share your questions with us at whydoesmypartner.com/contact

If you want to dive in deeper, consider attending our upcoming workshops. Learn more at whydoesmypartner.com/events

Mentioned in this episode:

Let's take a moment to acknowledge our amazing sponsor The Academy of Therapy Wisdom. Jules is one of their many amazing educators. And because you listen to us, the Therapy Wisdom team is offering a secret code to give you free access to one of Jules' 1 hour Wise Conversations. Visit Therapywisdom.com or click the link in the show notes and use the ‘WDMP’ discount code."

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About the Podcast

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Why Does My Partner
Answering questions from people who want help in relationships.

About your hosts

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Jules Shore

Juliane Taylor Shore LMFT, LPC, SEP specializes in trauma recovery and relational health. She has worked with couples and adults in her private practice in Austin, TX since 2009. She teaches Interpersonal Neurobiology to her interns, at local universities, and privately. When she's not working, Jules spends time in the hill country and with her husband, daughter, and dog. Learn more about Jules’ teachings at cleariskind.com
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rebecca wong

Rebecca Wong LCSWR, SEP has been practicing psychotherapy since 2003, blending modalities for relational trauma healing. She maintains a private practice in New Paltz, NY on unceded Lenapehoking land where she reside with her husband, their teens, and a handful of four-legged furry mischief-makers. Rebecca works virtually with people in the states of New York, Colorado, and Massachusetts. She also offers relationship intensives, experiential workshops. Learn more about Rebecca’s work and podcasts at connectfulness.com
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Vickey Easa

Vickey Easa LICSW has been a therapist since 2008, adding in Relational Life Therapy in 2016. She loves spreading the information of Relational Health to anyone who will listen; professionally AND personally. She sees adults, both individuals, and couples, and recently began public speaking on the topic of Healthy Self Esteem. No pets yet; her husband, two children, and watching TV keep her busy enough. Learn more about Vickey’s work at vickeyeasa.com